Thursday, October 24, 2013

I'M SO CONFUSED!

Yup, that's what I feel like right now.

Well, let's see what's going on in my life right now... The people who are supposed to "educate" me are incompetent idiots, I am in an honors course when I can't handle honor's level work, I'm starting to look like a female version of L Lawliet because I'm up 'till two in the morning 'cause my nerves are so rattled from being in a building with other human beings for nearly seven hours, I constantly feel like the air around me is liquid water (Probably something I should talk to a doctor about.), and I'm starting to get the feeling that if I don't figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life by tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be burned at the steak like a witch. So yeah, everything's going fantastic in my life.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel nervous all the time, sometimes everything just gets to me and I just want to either scream or break down and cry. I'd talk to my mom about this, but she already has enough on her plate right now, and I'm not really that comfortable with talking to my dad...

I don't know, all I know is I want a hug right now.

  Yeah... Like that...

Oh well, I already feel a little bit better writing this down. (Or, rather, typing.) I know, the problems that I have in high school aren't going to be the end of the world, but damn it, I want out of that place! It's too fucking stressful! It's bad enough that I have to worry about quizzes, tests, homework, and all that other shit but I also have to worry about getting shot walking into the building! Anyone else hear about what happened in Nevada? I wouldn't be surprised if that happened here. (Not that I'm making a threat if a member of law enforcement happens to be reading this, although I highly doubt that.)

Okay. Now on to what you all are probably wondering about.

Betrayed

To be honest... I don't know where I'm going with it anymore. Well, I do know where I want to go, but I don't know how to get there properly. I feel like all the characters are out of character and my narrating style is to rigid. I just don't know how to loosen up. I think doing some sort or writing exercise online might help with the latter problem, but the former...

The only way I can see being able to write the characters in character is if I start from the beginning, which means going back to either the first book in the Hi no Nami Series, "The Games" or the second one "The Game of Life". If I do decide to do that, I'm not gonna be able to post them on fanfiction... But I haven't decided on anything yet. Just wanted to let you know what I've been thinking. I think I'm gonna have to go back and read The Hunger Games again before I decide.

Besides, I've been feeling a little disconnected from both The Hunger Games and Shugo Chara! Series lately. I blame this:

  
For getting me addicted to this:


And making me waste my time reading fan fics about their possible relationship. Especially one that has to do with Disney Princesses and tainted fruit.

So, yeah. That's all I have to say. Now enjoy this pic of Yuuki and Zero because I don't think I have any Vampire Knight pics on here yet.


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